While a quantified list would be fairly easy to create for things I love about Japan, I realized that the first several would all essentially be the same thing.  As I’ve been reminded many times in my short life I “like to eat”.  GQ recently named Tokyo as the best city for food in the world, and it’s hard for me to disagree.

Nostalgia goes a long way when trying to rate quality of food.  Nothing will ever be quite as delicious as Great Grandma’s chicken and noodles.  Not because the ingredients were more complicated or the flavor was that much more savory, but because it will always be a symbol of something greater.

This is why a few of my close friends are in agreement that when we think back in 10 years what we miss about Japan, we’ll probably all answer “Coco’s”

Coco Ichibanya Curry House is in many ways as important to the survival of U.S. servicemen living in Japan as the air they breathe.  It’s hard to find a soul on base that hasn’t tried Coco’s, and I’d say a fair share frequent it at least once a week (two days ago for myself).  Aside from the obvious “it tastes good!!!!!”, it is hard to describe why Coco’s is as good as it is.  In a large vat, a basic blend of spices, pork, tomato base, and god knows what else is kept at temperature all day, to be mixed with various spice levels (1-10… 3 being spicier than any American fast food) and other ‘stew’ items, and then served over rice.  Typically you’ll also add some type of protein (eggs, pork cutlets, squid… you name it) an any other veggies you crave, and serve it up with a side of almost-too-hot Nan bread.  Nutrition info isn’t posted for good reason, as I’ve been informed that a typical serving is in excess of 1200 calories.  Somehow, this doesn’t stop Sailors or locals though.  Open until extremely late, I honestly cannot remember ever seeing the place empty.  Various other curry shops are littered about greater Tokyo, but Coco’s is “Ichibanya” (#1) for a reason.

Ramen.  The only real tragedy about ramen in Japan, is that you realize you’ve been calling those instant lunches from Nissan the same thing.  While the noodles may be the same diameter, and the general squiggle of the noodles are similar in appearance, it’s like calling a Big Mac a Kobe beef steak.  There are so many ramen shops not only in Yokosuka, but around Japan, that it’s hard to pin down just one.  The fact that it’s not only allowed but considered polite to slurp makes for a great learning curve on how to eat the noodles when they’re far to hot to eat traditionally.

Akiniku/Shabu-Shabu.  While the Japanese have quite a myriad of different flavors available, they seem very intent on making a huge variety of ways to eat as well.  Those not familiar with chopsticks will be hard pressed to find a good Akiniku/Shabu-Shabu restaurant that makes any kind of sense.  Both Akiniku and Shabu Shabu function off of the same basic premise.  Here’s some food;  cook it yourself.  One might find this to be a bit ridiculous outside of a fondue restaurant, but both offer truly great food quality.  Akiniku is essentially the Japanese version of Korean BBQ.  A large bowl filled with glowing charcoal is placed at the center of the table with a rounded grill on top.  You can order any type of meat you can imagine (horse anyone?) or go for the all-you-can-eat option and get all sorts of thin cut strips of deliciousness.  Shabu Shabu is similiar, only instead of a grill you are given a large vat of broth or plain water that is quickly brought to a boil, and several cooking chopsticks.  The meat is served so thin that by dipping the meat in the water for 3-5 seconds it’s already cooked completely.  My initial reaction prior to trying Shabu Shabu was something like “who wants to eat boiled meat? I want to taste the stuff not water it down”.  I was very quickly humbled by the fact that since it’s cooked so quickly, you lose next to no flavor from the meat.  Also, since many of the broths are flavored (spicy!) you get to taste all sorts of things.  Tossing mixed vegetables and other sauces in the broth also makes for whatever flavor you’d like.  The downside to both of these culinary experiences is that I’m fairly confident that even though I’m tasting something delicious, I’m still likely doing it wrong.  You usually get a good number of sauces that probably aren’t meant for what you dip them in, and somehow we always end up with extra chop sticks or strainers or mystery utensils.  Still… did i mention it’s delicious?

Mini Stop/7eleven.  While those I’m with usually by habbit call it a “gas station”… your typical corner convenience store rarely if ever sells petrol.  They do however, sell truly epic food for next to nothing.  While the ‘nutritional value’ of a gas station sandwich or rice ball isn’t quite lean… but for 100 yen, it’s very often a quick fix.

Vending Machines. While the marvels of non-soda vending machines have spread worldwide… no where are they more prevalent than in the land of the rising sun.  As my entire family will testify, the selection is truly mind-numbing, and good luck finding a square block ANYWHERE that doesn’t have 3 or 4.  If you make a point to get one at almost everyone you stop to (as my brother did) you’ll find yourself with quite a few empty cans in your pockets.  Personal favorites include CC Lemon, Coffee Max, and any garden variety cool green tea.

Sushi.  Because I saved the best for last.  Imagine if you would, a world where there is a sushi shop around every corner.  Now also imagine, that the fish is fresh, perfectly just barely cool, with fresh wasabi (not fake horseradish nonsense), and not also imagine a place where each plate (4 rolls or 2 nigiri) is only a buck.  Sure, they’re backwards here in some ways… but the motherland of sushi does it correct in the way no uppity bistro in the bay area or some overpriced trendy spot in hyde park could.  Of all the things to come to Japan for… Sushi is probably it.

If anyone actually wants specific recommendations for where to go in/around tokyo, let me know.

In a place like Tokyo, it can at times be daunting to try to qualify the bulk of your experience when you consider just how vast the community is.  With literally 30 million people in the Kanto plain, no matter how much you see, there’s always the polar opposite somewhere else.  However, with a grain of salt it is pretty easy to identify things that are irritating.  A warning to future travelers who may come seeking the land of golden Nintendo controllers, Godzilla, or an endless supply of japanese schoolgirls (who by the way, by definition, are under 18).

1. The Yelling. in a society that values looking busy over looking organized, in even the most tame urban environments you will find girls in long jackets screaming gibberish in Japanese through megaphones.  When I say gibberish I’m not referring to the fact that I don’t speak Japanese… but literally these people are paid to sound completely unintelligible to the passers by.  They serve only to get your attention long enough to enter the business.  This is so ironic considering what a lack-of-public-interaction society Japan is.  It is shameful to be yelling to get a friends attention in a busy crowd, yet yelling into a megaphone strings of unintelligible syllables is somehow a positive business strategy.

2. Everyone smokes.  Despite all the jokes in America about how terrible it is that you can’t smoke in bars, it’s something I’d actually grown to like.  Being in a place where hanging out and not smelling terrible in the morning is actually quite pleasant.  In Japan, it’s not just bars.  Nearly every restaurant you’ll go to has a smoking section.  It’s fashionable to smoke here in the way it was in the 50s, and trendy billboards and vending machines litter the landscape talking of new ‘nanotech’ cigarettes.

3. The Fashion. Specifically, the women’s fashion.  I’m sure were there any editors of vogue that read my blog I’d be hit with a string of comments informing me that all extreme fashion eventually becomes subdued enough to make it to GAP shelves, or how it’s ‘wearable art’ but there’s nothing about this that is art.

4. People don’t like Americans. This isn’t a problem limited to Japan, nor does it apply to everyone in the country, but by and large if you are over 35 you give most Gaijin at best a general avoidance.  If you are engaged by the locals, it is often as an attempt to practice their English, or to save face, but with the exception of young girls in Shibuya, you’ll be hard pressed to find conversation without significant effort.

5. Gambling.  Right up there with the yelling, you’ll find Pachinko and slots establishments every block or two, and they all seem obsessed with Neon Genesis Evangelion.  These can at times be very near porno theaters (yes, they still exist in Japan) and other less wholesome businesses.  It’s not really the existence of these businesses that frustrates me… it’s the fact that they are everywhere, and always full.  There was an article in a Japanese newspaper regarding the new Child Subsidy (Japan’s population is declining fairly drastically so the government literally pays you every time you have a child).  This article annotated that every time they have increased the subsidy, gambling has had a direct correlative increase.

6.  Hair.  In spite of the elder generation really not being fond of Americans, the lengths the younger generation will go to emulate American culture is almost without limit.  The problem is, somewhere along the line, they got it wrong.  So instead of having the bleach blondes, you get this.  It’s fashionable to look unnatural, and this goes for America as well, but in Japan it’s just extreme.

7. The Quasi Language Barrier.  I say “quasi” because it’s not as it is in Spain or Brazil or even Chile where you know that the only people in general that speak English are those in tourist businesses.  In Japan, you never know who understands what, or how confused you’ll be when going to a given place.  In learning a minimal amount of Japanese you can find your way around just fine, but it’s amazing how must people understand but don’t want you to think they understand.  When on a train, in a normal conversation everyone will ignore you until they hear one thing (maybe less politically correct things…) and shoot you a dirty look.  On the same token often times people will intentionally act ignorant in order to save themselves the shame of speaking incorrectly.  Not to mention many English words or business names have to be Japanized in order to be understood.  McDonalds is “Makodonada”.  My apartment complex Velasis is “Verasis” etc.  At times I almost wish that no one spoke any English at all just so you’d know what to expect.

8.  The fact that you’re always right.  The service oriented retail industry in Japan is at first such a refreshing change.  People always say thank you, always try to help, and are always smiling and seemingly happy.  The downside, is when they make a mistake.  On no less than 10 occasions I’ve ended up taking cab drivers or shop clerks for upwards of 20 dollars just because they refused to understand I was trying to correct them on change.  The other day I literally argued with a cab driver for 10 minutes to tell him that he was giving me back 1000 yen too much.  When he finally busted out his phone to show me on his calculator, he seemed disappointed and shamed that I was helping him out.  This also happened once in a furniture store where I received a free mattress with a similar situation.

9.  The roads.  As much as the sheer population density of Japan makes this an inevitability, roads in Japan are insanely cramped and narrow.  Roads never have turn lanes, meaning that if you are turning right (remember, they drive on the left here) you literally just stop in your lane and hold up traffic.  There’s also this awesome tradition drivers have of parking right on the street.  If the lanes were traditional North American sized, this wouldn’t be as huge an issue, but this literally forces merging for everyone in the lane… every time.  All drivers therefore have to pay about 500% more attention than they would even in a larger U.S. city.  There’s also this misconception that all Japanese cars are smaller.  While there are a few smart cars on the road, there’s an equal share of stupidly large vans.

10.  It’s not America.  Ethnocentrism be damned, there are so many times when the little things just stack up.  Even if Japan were the land of milk and honey, when the people you care most about in the world are half the world away, it’s just not going to stack up.  Also, who in their right mind would ever want to pay $50 for a large pizza?

Or rather, many things did.

In reality though, very few of them seemed fit to share.  As a man caught in a stage of near unending nebulous ‘waiting’, I’ve found myself fit to pour my hours into mind numbing time sinks.  While fairly unproductive… the list of things left to accomplish at my current stage is short enough that were it to be emptied, I’d have even less motivation than I do now.

Specifically, my move from Uraga, (that’s right on the mouth of the Tokyo bay for those of you who have yet to come visit) to Everett, WA is looking to be in it’s latter stages of finality.  As soon as the Bureau of Naval Personnel funds my orders, I can start looking for a new place.

My lovely car has seen fit to die (alternator if I were to guess)… which as caused a few interesting side effects.  Walking the 1.5 miles to the train station daily to and from work, (coupled with the hefty walk to the base gate, and to the pier)  makes for a 60+ minute commute, I’ve seen Japan in ways I chose to ignore previously.  The image of the busy “Salary Man” running to the train station in a business suit has become a self realized reality at 5:30am.  Once sitting down, everyone promptly falls into near-slumber.  Eyes closed, head down, world off.  Through luck or subconscious, all know exactly when to get up and get off, even in spite of the sleepily and quietly announced station names prior to arrival.  This is probably very similar to any bustling metropolis, but the wonders and efficiency of the Tokyo train systems I’m told are unique in many respects.  In the days when I actually attended journalism conferences, I remember loving Portland for the same reason, but after visiting a friend of mine on a layover recently, realize just how overly positive memory can be.

There has been quite a bit of commotion regarding the destinations of our summer deployment.  Due to OPSEC I can’t voice all of them just yet, but I’ll leave it to say that there has been a rather epic pissing contest amongst some very senior military officials, to the point that very few people know who’s fighting for what anymore.

Oh, and we got new uniforms.  Older people in the Navy hate them as they are a deviation from tradition, but I vastly prefer looking like a military member than a janitor.

I revealed inadvertently to my boss that I am, in fact, a pacifist.  While to many this brings up a certain scene from full metal jacket, I’ve never been one to think violence is justified on a mass scale.  This is why by and large I find it odd that the grander portions of the population view the military as gun toting or right wing.  People of like interests gravitate to each other, and maybe that could be the case here, but I have met a good amount of  intelligent, well spoken, non-aggressive people serving in this aquatic war-fighting community.  This may be the exception, and not the rule, and YES… I do with I’d joined the peace corps instead.  Still, very few people join the military to kill someone, and I’d say a fair amount would never volunteer.

Seven more months until the next big change.